The loner

The touch was light to the skin, the hairs on my arm tingled. Her smile charming, ever so casually she put her arms around my neck. Using her index and middle fingers she toyed around with my ear lobe gently, enjoying the fact that I was mesmerized.

Brushing her hands off me, I took a step back, looked into her pearl white eyes and firmly said


“Sikufanyii assignment”

Standing around us were two of my closest friends and a few classmates. They burst into laughter. Feigning a broken heart she took a step towards me and reached for my arm and began caressing it.

“Aki woiye, laptop yangu imespoil”

I must admit for a moment the blood in my head rushed and I contemplated doing her assignment. But not in front of the guys, I have to stand my ground. What kind of example would I be setting anyway? I took another step back, this time wiping the smile off my face and assuming a stern expression. My eyes were near narrow slits and my eyebrows were raised.

This time even my tone was serious

“Shika laptop yangu basi kama ndio shida but sikufanyii”

Aki please nifanyie
Aki please nifanyie

From the look in her eyes I could tell she wished the earth would open up and swallow her. But I was having none of it, my life was already hard enough I wasn’t looking to complicate it with an assignment relationship.

Been the silent guy in a class does not necessarily man ‘easily gullible’. People like me have mastered the art of deception. You learn a lot from been silent and observing others that feel ‘home’ in the same environment.
The back was my home, from my secluded corner I had an un-hindered view of the class. I noticed everything, if a guy sneezed and covered his arms in snort and went on to shamelessly rub it off on the back of his pants I would notice. Unsuspecting friends would then come and give the same guy hearty hand shake filled with chest bumps. If only they knew. But no one paid attention to the kid in the back of the class with ear buds in enjoying his music. Nobody cared what he was up to, he was a loner that’s all they needed to know.

So here I was – the loner saying no to a girl that thought heaven and earth were hers. Hands down she had the best derriere that campus has ever seen. Even lecturers were mesmerized. If she ever had problems with her grade she’d just walk into class fashionably late and entertain the lecturer to a ‘getting to my seat as slowly and as sexily as possible’ show.  She’d get a B. I always thought the B was for booty, but what do I know.

In her little world, she might have imagined how the scenario would have played out. A little smiling, twirling of the hair, light touching, and seductive words – presto, assignment done. After all this wasn’t the first time, I had seen her do it a million times before almost flawlessly. She had the carrot, and she dangled it in front of those dumb ass donkey types that pass for guys at university halls. She’d say jump, they’d say how high.

Dignity for who?

So the loner was being difficult, and here she was pulling her A game – doing me a favor she thought. After all, she never really saw me hanging out with other girls – not that I didn’t but my operations were clandestine (plus a gentleman never kisses and tells) if only walls had mouths but this is a story for another day. Her attention only should be enough to have me falling over myself, starting up my machine, and typing away her six page report right?

So why was I been difficult? After her efforts hit the wall, the frustration began showing. Her once smiling face had contortions around the forehead and a grimace begun to form.

“Aki mbona?” She asked clearly frustrated

“Na venye ummeiva iyo unit” she stressed her argument

“Ntakulipa basi”

“Pay who? Pay me?” I sarcastically retorted

“Tumia iyo pesa utengeneze laptop” I added then laughed mockingly.

Where does she get off offering to pay me? Does my shirt look beat? I definitely know she had never been to my wallet otherwise this offer would have come ages ago. I thought to myself all the while maintaining my stern look.

“Ni sawa tu basi” she replied apparently having given up

“Give me you number though”

“You don’t mind me calling and asking a few questions, do you?”

Her tactics were changing, I wasn’t dumb. I wasn’t stupid either, when a hot girl wants your number you give it to her – or so I thought.


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