The Butt of the Smoke

My fling with cigarettes started almost 15 years ago. It was nothing romantic, not like in the movies, where a cow boy tips his hat up, pops a Marlboro between his lips dangling them gently, flicks open a silver lighter and drags on the burning flame letting out a slow long puff followed by a... Continue Reading →

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Beer In A Church

It is Monday, I am sullen and the Matatu I am in is blasting Rick Ross. An underrated rapper, because no one ever really looks past his weight and his groan. He is telling us that he wants to get buried in clean draws when he dies. Decent request if you ask me. You do... Continue Reading →

May your whisky never run dry

I assume God has a listening tool, like these social media ones. So that he seats on his throne, bored to death and listens as pings chime all over because people are busy mentioning him. That he sometimes ignores all of them because we can be annoying. In fact we are annoying. We are that... Continue Reading →

We need a mejja uplift

I don’t like writing about artistes because I am an artiste myself. If anyone were to write anything about me, even if it were nice, I would analyze every word. I would look for hidden meanings. I would print out the article and go over it with a highlighter and look for literary devices. I... Continue Reading →

Social Peacocks

I love to hate social media because on there, everyone is somebody. We have philosophers, comedians, doctors, traditional medicine men, feminists, motivational speakers, marketers, digital experts, entrepreneurs, travel gurus, influencers and anything else under the sun. It is a market where Everyone is a mad man. A shit show.  Especially since everyone is either faking... Continue Reading →

Birthday Headaches

People love to celebrate their achievements, I mean anyone would love to do that. First job? Promotion? First car? First house? New high score on candy crush? Celebrate it. It is human nature. Also we live in a world where you won’t get a pat on the shoulder for hitting your milestones. Maybe from your... Continue Reading →

Call me Daddy

If you’ve never thought about getting rich quick then you are probably not human. And you probably do not live in Nairobi. And you have also never seen an episode of perfect match where financial stability is the number one attractive factor in a guy. Everything else can be compromised. What is the use of... Continue Reading →

New burst of NRG

At some point I stopped listening to radio. It had become too cliché. Everyone wanted to be the next Caroline Mutoko, Maina Kageni or Muthoni Bwika (if you know you know). The topics on rotation were tired. They had been chewed and wrung out and had nothing left in them. They lay on their deathbeds... Continue Reading →

Sacrasm: Take it or Leave it

People that miss sarcasm need to take life with a pinch of salt, slice of lemon and three tequila shots. You cannot deny yourself the beauty that is sarcasm yet you are living in a conceited world. People that choose to miss sarcasm have some bitterness in them about everything. Usually, they’re sitting on high... Continue Reading →

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